Tsunderella
by Magnolia Teacup
Summary: Lovino is a grumpy, overworked villager. Antonio is the crown prince. Throw in a grand ball, giant tomato carriage, Yaoi Godmother, and some good ol' bippity boppity boo and you've got one heck of story. APH parody of "Cinderella". Spain/Romano. Enjoy. :


**Um. Hello there. :'D  
>Since these introductions are annoying and no one actually reads them, I'm gonna keep this short: I don't own Hetalia, nor do I own Cinderella. They belong to Hidekaz Himaruya and Charles Perrault, respectively (with some copyright infringement on Disney's version). ;D<br>ENJOY, PEOPLE OF THE INTERNET.  
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><p>Once upon a time, in a faraway land, there was a tiny kingdom - peaceful, prosperous, and rich in romance and tradition. In the kingdom's royal palace lived a very handsome Prince. He was next in line to rule the country, but was viewed as too immature and carefree to take on the duties as the kingdom's heir.<p>

"Perhaps, if he finds a wife, he'll mature?" suggested the King. "With a woman to love and look after, he'll become a man in no time!"

Thus, a grand ball was planned, and every eligible maiden in the land was invited. The Prince was to choose a suitable bride, or so the King hoped.

Our story begins around this eventful time...

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><p>Morning sunshine poured in through the crack in the curtains, casting a single line of light into the small bedroom. Within, Lovino stirred from beneath a pile of sheets atop an old mattress. He dreamed happily, never once thinking of the new day's duties. All was peaceful...<p>

"EEEAAAAAAAAHHH!" screamed a familiar voice from downstairs. "Grandpa Rome! Come save me! The cat just bit me!" Shuffling was heard, and then a sudden clatter.

"What do you want me to do about it! I can't handle that evil cat! Why do we even have a cat in the first place?"

"Well, _someone_ needs to feed the cat..."

"Yeah, isn't it your brother's job?"

"Oh! That's right! I'll ask him!" The young man's spastic footsteps could be heard as he bounded up the steps. Lovino's door swung open. "Fratello! Wake up! You need to feed the cat!"

Lovino's eyes shot open angrily. "Why can't _you_ do it, Feliciano?" he seethed.

"Because he _bit _me! And he's way too scary..."

"You're just a coward." Lovino got out of bed and put on some clothes. He sighed; the days always started out like this. From morning to evening, Lovino would do all the chores. His grandfather and younger brother never pulled their own weights: Grandpa Rome was always out making passes at the women of the town, and Feliciano was either sleeping, eating, flirting with girls, or pestering the local baker, Ludwig. With his only family pushing their chores onto him, it was no wonder why he was in a perpetual bad mood.

Lovino poured a bowl of milk for the feline, who was currently lazing around the barn.

"Come get it, Ivan!" he called. "Breakfast!" As if on cue, the chubby cat strutted in and plopped himself down in front of the bowl. The dark-furred animal stared up at Lovino in thanks, and then started to lap up the white liquid. Lovino shivered; that cat's gaze always managed to frighten him. '_That's silly_,' he thought. '_Why should I be afraid of a cat? I'm not a mouse._'

"Oh, right," he said aloud. "I need to feed the mice, too." Most would think he was odd for having rodents as his only friends, but Lovino had no one else to talk to about his problems. There were three mice, named Eduard, Raivis, and Toris. He found them, one day, cowering in the corner as they were being stalked by Ivan. Now, Lovino wasn't the mushy type who goes around saving small animals, or anything like that. But as he passed the scene, he couldn't help but notice the terrified look in the eyes of the three mice. Kicking Ivan squarely in the backside, Lovino scooped up the trembling trio into his palms and brought them up to his room. '_Pathetic lot_,' he'd thought. '_Pathetic... but somehow still cute_.'

The young man shook the memory from his thoughts and thrust his hand into a bag of chickenfeed, promptly spreading the grains along the floor on the other side of the barn which Ivan couldn't get to. Before leaving to do the rest of his chores, he watched from the corner of his eye the three mice hesitantly coming out of their hiding places to feast on the chickenfeed.

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><p>The Prince merely gazed out the window that looked out over the western half of his father's kingdom. '<em>That's right<em>,' he thought. '_My father's kingdom, soon to be mine._' He sighed, anticipating the upcoming ball that his father, King Francis, had planned. How was he supposed to fall in love in just one night? The Prince did not believe in love at first sight.

"Antonio!" called the King, rushing down the hall in his flowing robes of blue and red. "Antonio, mon fils!"

The Prince turned around to greet his father. "Buenos días, papá," he said halfheartedly, a weak smile playing at his lips.

"Mon dieu, why do you look so sad?"

"Well, it's just that I was thinking about the ball." He shifted his gaze to the window for a brief moment. "I've never fallen in love before, so what makes you think I'll fall in love now?"

"Ah! That's exactly what I wanted to talk to you about," said King Francis, putting his arm around his son's shoulders. "When you meet the girl of your dreams at the ball tonight, remember to sweep her off her feet! No son of mine will fail at a romantic endeavour. So, here," he thrust out his fist. Locked within his long fingers was a single rose of the deepest red. "When you've found the girl you want to marry, give her this rose. Chicks dig flowers."  
>Antonio gently took the efflorescent stalk into his hand and peered longingly into its velvety folds. Maybe this rose would release a magic spell tonight, and let him fall in love for the first time? The Prince couldn't tell. After all, magic was only for fairytales.<p>

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><p>After a long day of cleaning the house, sweeping the barn, washing the windows, scouring the dishes, and doing the laundry, Lovino wanted nothing more than to relax by the fireplace and eat a nice, big bowl of tortellini that would be lightly covered with a delightfully flavourful marinara sauce. Perhaps he'd get Feliciano to make it for him? After all, his younger brother had spent all day down in the town square, successfully avoiding all his chores. '<em>Probably bothering poor Ludwig<em>,' Lovino thought spitefully. He walked into the now-tidy parlour to see both his grandfather and brother dressed in their finest attire.

"Lovino!" outburst Grandpa Rome. "What are you doing still wearing your housework clothes?"

"Huh? But this is how I always dress... Wait, why are _you_dressed so formally?"

"Ve~! Didn't you hear, fratello?" Feliciano tilted his head happily. "The Prince is hosting a grand ball tonight!"

"Hmm..." Lovino thought for a moment. "Yes, but isn't it a ball just for all the (single ladies) all of the eligible _maidens _in the kingdom?"

Grandpa Rome folded his arms and slyly cocked his head. "Haven't you ever heard of _party-crashing_?"

Lovino exhaled, holding in his frustration at the immaturity of his grandfather.

Feliciano spoke up, "Why don't you come, too? It'll be a great chance to meet a lovely lady~! Maybe you'll even fall in love."

"I don't need love," Lovino spat harshly, face reddening. "I'm not going. If you need me, I'll be outside in the garden, tending to my tomatoes."

"At this late hour?" Grandpa Rome asked, concerned. "Why don't you just come for a little while? It'll be fun!"

"I said I'm not going!" And with that, Lovino stormed out of the house, slamming the door shut behind him.

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><p>Lovino angrily and abruptly sat down on a garden bench next to his tomato plants. "Goddamn bastards..." He crossed his arms and huffed, face red with anger. "I don't need love...!" He gritted his teeth, and then sighed sadly. Deep inside, Lovino really did want to go to the ball. And meeting a girl would be nice. He daydreamed about meeting his true love. '<em>She would have long hair<em>,' he thought. '_I've always been attracted to ladies with long hair_.' He wanted someone kind, gentle, and with a great smile, one that could light up any room with a single grin.

As he fantasized, Lovino suddenly became aware of a hand placed softly on his shoulder. He gasped and turned around to see whom it belonged to. Sitting beside him on the bench was a beautiful woman with long, brown hair that fell in silky tresses down her back. Her pale green dress sparkled in the moonlight, and a luminescent gold carnation adorned her head as a blossoming hairpin.

"Hello, Lovino," she spoke softly, a wide grin settling pleasantly on her face. "My name is Elizabeta. I'm your Yaoi Godmother."

The young man stared in shock. "... Huh?"

Elizabeta stood up in front of him, placing her hands on her slender hips in a strong gesture. "I'm here to help you, silly!"

"Thanks, but I don't need any help..."

"Oh, yes you do!" She suddenly pulled a thin, white wand out of from what appeared to be thin air. "You're going to the ball whether you like it or not."

Lovino stood up in protest. "Eh! I don't need to go to the ball! I was perfectly fine just tending to my tomatoes..."

"While daydreaming about meeting your dream girl?" Elizabeta tilted her head and flashed a white-toothed smile.

Groaning, Lovino's face turned redder. "Just leave me alone. I don't need a... um..."

"Yaoi Godmother?"

"Yes, that. I don't need a Yaoi Godmother." He crossed his arms. "Now, go away. I just want to be left alone."

"Oh, really?" The sparkling woman paced in a circle around the young man. "What if I were to tell you that you'd meet your true love tonight at the ball?"

Lovino froze. "What? You mean..."

"That's right. Your true love will be at the ball tonight." She stopped in front of his face, staring deep into his earthen-coloured eyes. "Won't you reconsider going?"

He turned his head away. "Are you... telling the truth?"

Elizabeta smiled. "I'm your very own Yaoi Godmother. Would I lie to you?"

To be honest, Lovino had no idea how to answer. So, he just went along. "... Alright. I'll go." He huffed, having been defeated by this mysterious stranger. "But how will I get there? My grandfather and brother took the carriage already."

The woman chuckled. "Leave that to me!" And with a simple flick of her magic wand, a nearby tomato from the garden grew and grew until it loomed over them both. Doors and windows formed out of the red, juicy fruit, and green tendrils looped around to form wheels. All in all, it was a rather impressive tomato carriage.

"That's a big tomato..." Lovino absentmindedly muttered, mouth agape.

"Now, let's see..." Elizabeta let her eyes wander about the garden. "Ah! Perfect!" Lovino followed her gaze to where it rested in the entrance to the barn. Though it was quite dark, he could make out the distinct shapes of three mice, huddling together in the hay. '_Eduard, Raivis, and Toris, no doubt,_' thought Lovino.

"Mice? But what do you need mice for?"

The Yaoi Godmother smiled slyly. "Oh, one can be in need of mice for many things. You, for example, will need them to pull your tomato carriage along to the ball."

"... Last time I checked, three small mice can't pull an entire carriage."

"I know," she said simply. Leaving Lovino with a confused look on his face, Elizabeta waved her wand once again and, in the place of the three mice, there stood three gorgeous stallions of the purest white. They stomped proudly and bowed their heads gracefully as they were strapped to the front of the carriage. "Now we need a carriage driver. Ah, yes! There he is!" She pointed to Ivan, who was poking his head out of the barn to see what all the fuss in the garden was about. Then, with another flick of her wand, the feline had turned into a tall, handsome gentlemen. He was donned in white and gold, and was seated at the front of the carriage to hold onto the reigns.

The whole fruit and equestrian ensemble seemed to glimmer in the moonlight, all wrapped up in a magical air.

"Wow..."

"You're welcome," Elizabeta chimed happily. "Now, you must be on your way, Lovino. You must hurry to the ball!"

"Um... Yes but-"

"No, no. You mustn't dawdle."

"Miss Yaoi Godmother!" he outburst. "I... Well, if I'm to go to the ball, don't you think I'd need more... um... _proper_ attire?"

Elizabeta finally noticed Lovino's worn and dirty cleaning clothes. "Goodness! Yes, we must put you in something more elegant." Before Lovino could say another word, the mysterious woman dramatically flicked her wand in his direction. Sparkles cascaded about him in a showy display of magic. But when he opened his eyes...

"Hey! This is a _dress_!" he complained, looking down at the shimmery light blue ball gown and poking the diamond tiara on his head.

"Oh, sorry," Elizabeta apologised. "That was from some movie I worked on a while back..."

After a few minor wardrobe malfunctions, Lovino was finally properly dressed in a classy suit. Perfectly tailored and cleanly coiffed, he cut quite a dashing figure as he stepped into the tomato carriage.

"Now, remember," his Yaoi Godmother forewarned. "My enchantments are only temporary and will wear off at midnight. Once the clock strikes twelve, the magic will vanish. Understood?"

"That's such a cliché..."

"Alright, then. Off you go! Your hot date is waiting for you~!" She gave a suggestive wink.

As Ivan prepared the three horses (who were formerly rodents) to leave, Lovino stuck his head out the window and said, "Um... Thank you, Yaoi Godmother." His cheeks were as red as the fruit he was riding in.

"You're welcome, dear," she called warmly as the tomato traveled out of sight behind a row of trees. "Now, for my next job... This 'Arthur Kirkland' fellow seems he's in need of my assistance!" And, in a flash, the Yaoi Godmother was gone, off to help those in need.

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><p>Prince Antonio feigned smile after polite smile to all of the beautiful maidens in poofy ball gowns who greeted him. Though he admitted these women were pretty, none of them stole his heart the way his father told him they would. He was beginning to think that true love was only make-believe. He cast the rose that the King had given him aside to lie on the floor in the corner of the ballroom to get trampled on by a dancing pair of heels.<p>

Up in the balcony, King Francis, and the Grand Duke, Sir Gilbert, watched with baffled expressions plastered on each of their faces.

"Je ne comprends pas..." the King complained. "How can he not find at least one girl? There are so many!"

"Maybe he just isn't awesome enough?" the Duke asked, caressing the head of the small yellow chick that rested on his shoulder. "Give him time, Your Highness."

The King sighed. "By the time I was his age, I had many women - and men - in my bed every night... What's wrong with my son?"

But the Duke didn't have time to answer; he was too occupied with the sudden mesmerised appearance of Prince Antonio.

Something - or some_one_, rather - had caught the Prince's eye. A lone figure, unannounced, made his way to the outskirts of the ballroom. He looked nervous - frantic, in the least.

The Prince, in a daze, walked over to this strange guest.

"Hola," he spoke softly. The mysterious guest turned around to reveal himself. He was a young man not much younger than Antonio himself, and his hazel eyes shone like amber. He took his hand within his.

"... Ciao," replied the stranger.

Maybe it was the magic, or even true love, that Antonio so vehemently didn't believe in, and that Lovino tried all his might to ignore, but the two gentlemen started dancing as soon as the band picked up a light waltz. They didn't know why their feet were carrying them all over the dance floor, and they didn't know who the other man was, but they _did_know that whatever this moment consisted of - be it love, friendship, or intrigue - made both the Prince and the commoner feel that light-as-air, magical feeling.

The women in the poofed out dresses and heels stared at the odd couple. Among them, Feliciano and Grandpa Rome sipped at their glasses full of red wine.

"Hey, Grandpa Rome," the young man poked his grandfather's arm, almost spilling his wine. "That man dancing with the Prince... Doesn't he look a lot like fratello?"

The older gentleman squinted his eyes, wavering drunkenly. "... No, that's not Lovino. He's too busy tending to his tomatoes."

"Oh, yeah," agreed Feliciano. "I almost forgot." He took another slug of his wine, and Grandpa Rome did the same.

Up on the balcony, Sir Gilbert remarked, "I always knew he was gay. You know, Your Highness, this is going to make it awfully difficult to have grandchildren."

"Don't worry," King Francis proclaimed, "We'll make it work out." The Prince just looked so happy; he wasn't going to ruin it for him.

The waltz finished, and the crowd of ball guests were silent, albeit a few whispers. Antonio led Lovino out a large glass door and into the Palace's gardens. They walked in silence - the magic of the waltz still lingering between them, apparently - to a small bench beside a pond and some rose bushes.

"Thank you for honouring me with that dance," the Prince said, finally letting go of the young man's hand.

"Oh um..." Lovino was at a loss for words. "You're welcome?"

Antonio chuckled and stared at their reflections in the pond's mirror-like surface. "You know, this is actually the first time I've danced with another man."

"What a coincidence," Lovino laughed. "Me, too." Though it was really the first time he ballroom danced with _anyone_, but he wasn't going to let this man know that.

For the rest of the evening, the two just talked pleasantly in the gardens. '_It's nice to have a real conversation with someone who isn't a rodent_,' thought Lovino.  
>Suddenly, he gasped; he remembered what his Yaoi Godmother had told him - that he would meet his true love tonight at the ball. He had yet to find the woman of his dreams.<p>

"Oh, um... I'm sorry, but I have to go," Lovino got up.

"What? But it's barely even midnight." Antonio reached to grab the man's hand, but Lovino managed to avoid his grasp.

"Eh? Midnight?"

Just then, the clock struck twelve.

"I'm sorry, but I have to go!" Lovino started running away from the Prince down the garden path.

"Wait! Please, don't go!"

"I have to! The spell is going to wear off!"

"What!"

"Oh, you wouldn't understand!" He raced down the flight of steps that led out of the Palace grounds. He saw the tomato carriage in the distance. '_I'm almost there!_'

"No!" Antonio called, quickly closing the distance between them. "I didn't even get your name!" He reached out and grabbed Lovino's arm.

"Ah! Let go!"

"Please, just stay," the man whined.

"I said _let go_!" Lovino needed some kind of weapon... Ah, yes. His shoe would do nicely. He efficiently removed it from his foot and used it as a projectile. It hit the Prince right in the middle of his forehead. Bull's eye.

Lovino managed to escape as Ivan brought the carriage to him. He drove away at top speed, trying to cover as much ground while the spell still lasted.

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><p>With his evening dance partner long out of sight, Prince Antonio rubbed his forehead and picked up the abandoned penny loafer that had been used as a weapon. "I'll find you, whoever you are," he vowed.<p>

"My Prince!" Sir Gilbert shouted. He ran over to Antonio, out of breath. "My Prince, did you actually propose marriage to that young man?"

"No, I-"

"What? I thought for sure you were into him..."

"Well-"

"Oh well. I'll just tell your father the disappointing news..."

"Sir Gilbert!" Antonio outburst. "... Can you do me a favour?"

And so it was proclaimed: all of the young men who were at the ball last night were to try on the one penny loafer that was left behind.  
>But, seeing as it had been a ball meant for young <em>maidens<em>, it was relatively easy to narrow their search down to one household.

The Grand Duke pulled up in front of the Vargas household.

"Ah yes..." he recalled. "There were those two men at the ball last night."

"The young silly one and the older man," Prince Antonio added. "The two that were actually uninvited..."

They got out of the carriage and knocked on the front door.

Inside, Grandpa Rome and Feliciano were languidly sprawled on the couch.

"Lovinoooooo," his grandfather drawled. "Get the dooooooor."

"Get the dooooooooor," Feliciano mimicked.

"Alright, alright, I'm coming!" Lovino angrily stomped down the stairs, a basket of laundry in hand. "Just because you two are hung over, it doesn't mean you have to be lazy all day."

"But, fratello~" his brother giggled, holding his throbbing head in his hands. "It was so fun~! There were so many girls and wine!"

"Yes, apparently _too much_ wine..." Lovino mumbled. He put down the laundry and opened the door. "Yes? Who're you?"

Sir Gilbert cleared his throat. "I am the Grand Duke of Awesome. Are there any young men in your household?"

"Well, just my brother and I..."

"And me!" Grandpa Roma slurred.

"You're not young."

"... Damn it."

Lovino turned back to the Duke. "Sorry, they're hung over."

"I can see that."

"Oh, so, you need my brother and I?"

The Duke brought out the white penny loafer. "Yes, may I borrow your foot for a moment?"

"Yessssss~!" Feliciano, despite his inebriated state, ran over to the front door and stuck his foot out. The duke placed the shoe on his foot and...

"Sorry, it appears to be a little big on you."

"Oh..." Feliciano looked disappointed.

Lovino sighed and lifted up his foot, as well. Sir Gilbert placed the penny loafer on his foot...

"A perfect fit!" Prince Antonio shouted from where he was standing off to the side of the Duke.

Lovino blushed. "Eh? Y-you're the one from last night!"

"Congratulations, Sir. You are now engaged to Prince Antonio." Sir Gilbert stepped aside.

"HUH!"

Antonio gracefully stepped over to Lovino. "That's right. The purpose of the ball last night was to find a wife. Well, you're not a woman, but I think I've fallen in love with you." He smiled.

"... WHAT!"

Antonio laughed. "I didn't even get your name last night."

"... YOU MEAN THE MAN I DANCED WITH LAST NIGHT IS THE _PRINCE_!"

"Yes, and now we're engaged," Antonio beamed happily.

"Aw~ Congratulations, fratello!" Feliciano patted his brother on the shoulder.

"I love weddings!" Grandpa Rome announced from his place on the couch. "This calls for a celebration. Feliciano! Get the wine!"

"Sì, Grandpa Rome~!"

"Do you have any beer?" the Grand Duke asked.

"I'm pretty sure we do. Feliciano! Get some beer, too!"

"Okay~!"

Prince Antonio gently took Lovino's hand within his. "This can be our engagement party," he said happily. "Oh hey, look! Your face looks like a tomato." He laughed.

"... Goddamn bastard..." Lovino mumbled.

_AND THEY ALL LIVED HAPPILY EVER AFTER._

Well, for the most part.

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><p><strong>Thank you for reading my story. :)<br>You don't have to review if you don't want to. I mean, it's not like I'm gonna hunt you down and force you to say what you will about my story. :T  
>OK ITS OVER. GO HOME AND GET OFF MY LAWN, YOU HOOLIGANS.<br>**


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